POLICE BUNGLE THE GHOST PLAGUE!
We now know that in fact the police were working on an investigation into the ghost plague. Sources say it was secretly code-named Operation Phantom!
However, Lead Detective Hinkenbushel has re-stated that “There are no such things as ghosts.” The police are saying the ‘alleged’ sightings were not connected to any paranormal activity, connected only by timing and random flowers. “Given there has been no property damage or no trespassing,” Lead Detective Hinkenbushel said, “the police are closing this investigation.”
Our sources tell us that the ghosts have been warned off for good. It’s unlikely we’ll be seeing any more ghosts for the time being.